The future is Bright! My journey to an alcohol-free life.
Alcohol is the one drug in our society that we have to justify turning down.
At the beginning of my alcohol-free journey, I started off a bit shy around this issue. I wanted to stay under the radar and not draw attention to the fact that I was quote-unquote "different" from everyone else.
Staying under the radar was really a survival mechanism during those early days when I was struggling, and trust me - there was lots of struggling going on. I was struggling with cravings and struggling with the very daunting forever question. So many conflicting thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Could I stop forever? Did I want to stop forever?
Could I really live in a world without alcohol in it?
When I was wrestling with these questions during those early days, I often felt like I wanted to crawl out of my skin.
I didn't understand this at the time, but it turns out my pre-frontal cortex (the rational, logical brain) and my limbic brain (the animal, emotional, brain) were in direct conflict. It really is no wonder then that those early days were so difficult to get through. I wanted to stop - that much was clear. But my body was actively working against me. The urges were so strong, and I didn't have the know-how or the tools to fight them off.
But then everything changed once I hired Jolene Park to coach me through her Gray Area Drinking Coaching program. She taught me how to regulate my nervous system and heal the craving brain. As the days turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months, the brain fog caused by years of drinking alcohol started to lift. As my nervous system started to regulate and my anxiety lessened, my confidence grew.
I started to become more and more vocal about this radical choice to live an alcohol-free lifestyle. The proof was in the pudding - every aspect of my life (and I mean every) was getting better and better, solidifying that this was the right choice for me.
These days, I'm at the point where turning down alcohol feels just as natural as brushing my teeth.
There's no more hiding or pretending about my choice to live an alcohol-free lifestyle. When it comes to alcohol, I've swapped FOMO (fear of missing out) with JOMO (joy of missing out) - a huge departure from a few years ago when I was cloaked in shame, scared to be found out, scared to be judged.
Something interesting happened at about the 18-month mark into my alcohol-free journey though. I was getting ready to turn down yet another alcoholic beverage in my face, when the person suddenly blurted out, "oh never mind, you can't drink, sorry."
Immediately, my defenses went up, and I felt pretty annoyed. My first thoughts were, "Is this person actually pitying me? Is that what's happening right now?"
Luckily I snapped out of it quickly, because I realized that she didn't mean anything malicious by that statement at all. Her choice of words illustrated where she is on her own journey with alcohol, and it happens to align with millions of others on the gray area drinking spectrum. And let's face it - I had the same exact sentiment for years when alcohol was playing a major role in my life.
Drinking alcohol has only ever sent me to dark places.
I'm officially done with letting it dim my bright light, so for me, "can't" is the wrong word.
I would say "don't" is more like it, as in I don't have to rely on alcohol to get through life anymore. I don't have to (or more importantly, I don't want) to drink to have fun or numb feelings I don't want to feel or quell overwhelming anxiety. I don't have to suffer from hangovers, cravings, or blacking out and not remembering what cringy thing I may have said the night before.
Alcohol is so pervasive and so normalized that we're trained to actually pity those who do not consume it for whatever reason. I know that I can't control how people are going to react to my personal choice to not drink, but I'm grateful to be part of the movement that's changing the conversation around this.
And it is changing - and reinforces my motto that The Future Is Bright!
#NoPityNecessary #NormalizeSobriety
REMEMBER…
EVERY DAY IS A GOOD DAY TO BE ALCOHOL-FREE AND SUNSETS ARE THE NEW HAPPY HOUR!
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