Breaking the Cycle of Substance Abuse: The Power of Science and Kindness ❤️
Have you, or someone you know, ever hit rock bottom?
Many people experience times of devastating lows in their lifetime.
For some, this presents as substance abuse which can create feelings of guilt, worthlessness, relationship breakdowns, job loss, financial duress, health issues – both physical and mental, and even homelessness.
A method commonly used to 'help' a person struggling with substance abuse is to display 'tough love.' It's done with the best intentions, but can have damaging or even lethal consequences for the addicted person.
Typically, tough love is demonstrated by:
An 'Intervention' – which includes confronting the person, sometimes in a group setting, to discuss their behavior and giving them an ultimatum, such as terminating the relationship if they don't do what the group wants.
Removing the person from the family home. E.g., kicking them out so they must fend for themselves.
Socially isolating the person and not associating with them until their behavior changes.
Refusing to pick them up if they ask you to get them, as they can't make their own way home due to inebriation.
These approaches can have catastrophic effects on the person struggling with substance abuse.
Addiction is often a response to emotional pain or trauma.
Treating a traumatized person with tough love can cause their condition to worsen and oftentimes leads to relapse. Tough love can also harm their mental health and cause them to feel abandoned and alone – so then they reach for the substance to self-soothe. It's a vicious cycle.
During my own journey to healthy living and sobriety, I was blessed to have the incredible support of my husband, Evan.
When family and friends suggested he practice tough love to break my addiction, he understood that that approach could crush me as a human and send me spiraling even further downwards.
Thankfully, he did the complete opposite. ❤️
Evan understood what I needed and supported me with love, kindness, compassion, and unwavering support.
My journey to becoming sober…
With Evan's gentle support, I found the strength to research various healing modalities. I participated in Spiritual Psychology Counseling, DBT therapy and a women's DBT processing support group. After a year and a half of that, I finally hired Jolene Park in January 2021.
This support network helped me recognize that I had crossed over from gray area drinking to the danger zone and they responded with proven strategies based on science. They helped me retrain my nervous system and thoughts and emotions around substance abuse (in my case alcohol) while reinforcing positive behaviors. I learned how to replace negative behaviors with positive actions to move forward.
The results were life changing.
An organization that understands and practices this theory of kindness through addiction is CMC: The Foundation for Change.
They believe that helping starts with 'Science + Kindness.'
"CMC: Foundation for Change puts the power of evidence-based strategies directly into the hands of individuals and communities affected by substance use.
Our Invitation to Change Approach takes the best science has to offer (including compassion!) and makes it easy to understand and put into action."
CMC: Foundation for Change is a non-profit organization dedicated to providing evidence-based tools to everyone who cares about a person struggling with substance abuse. They've taken the best science has to offer and translated it into a practical, compassionate, and accessible approach for helping people take the 'Invitation to Change (ITC).'
CMC's 'ITC' groups provide a safe space for members to share difficult and painful experiences. It's a place where members can learn and practice effective ITC skills like self-compassion, positive communication, self-care, and self-awareness. Through training & support groups, ITC helps family members, friends, treatment providers, community leaders, and really anyone in a helping role. ❤️
CMC has multiple ongoing projects including:
Scholarships to workshops and training for family members and community-level mental health providers
Providing books and resources to community-level organizations
Supporting the ongoing development of the ITC community support groups program
Development and pilot of a new support group program for family members who have lost a loved one to substance-related death
Development and pilot of a new support group program for Spanish speakers
All of their projects are fully funded by generous donations from the public.
46 million people (post-pandemic) suffer from substance abuse, while only 10-15% access help. Those who do are often met with stigma, shame, and misunderstanding. In addition, there are over 100 million family members nationwide suffering from their loved ones' addiction.
Family members want their loved ones to be healthy and safe, but they usually lack the skills to help.
The CMC/ITC approach of science and kindness ❤️ is the opposite of the old ways of the punitive, tough love method I mentioned above.
Recently, to help this wonderful organization, I nominated and delivered a presentation about CMC in front of the Joyride Society at their 2023 Annual Voting Party.
I'm so very proud and excited that through my nomination and presentation, The Joyride Society members voted to support CMC: Foundation for Change and gifted them with a check for $7,125.
You can watch my presentation here:
The Joyride Society is an organization of givers who want to make a difference in their communities, and beyond, through their contributions.
The generous gift of $7,125, from The Joyride Society will help CMC: Foundation for Change further their work in educating and supporting those suffering addiction - and their families and loved ones ❤️.
You can learn more about The Joyride Society HERE.
If you'd like to learn more about CMC: Foundation for Change and the amazing work they are doing throughout our communities, you can find them HERE.
CMC has some resources to help those suffering from addiction and their families. Two that may be helpful to you are:
“The Beyond Addiction Workbook for Family and Friends”
“The Invitation to Change – A Short Guide”
These and other resources are available on the CMC website HERE.
Addiction is a serious problem with far-reaching, devastating effects. It's my mission in life to help people break free from the grips of alcohol, so they can experience lives full of love, joy and opportunity - for themselves and their loved ones.
If you want to explore an alcohol-free life or would like to improve your health, it would be my greatest pleasure to help you on your journey.
I have two different coaching options:
Health Coaching Program
Are you experiencing sickness, fatigue, depression, pain or weight issues? If so, then your body isn’t working as it should. There are many reasons for these health issues, and sometimes working with a Health Coach can help.
As your Health Coach, I support you through diet and lifestyle changes to help you feel the best you can and live a brighter, happier life.
Learn more about my Health Coaching Program
Gray Area Drinking Program
It’s challenging to change your drinking habits - especially when they’ve crept up and have been happening for a long time.
That’s where I can help you. I work holistically, focusing on your gut health, neurotransmitters, and dysregulated nervous system to calm, soothe, and get everything back in balance. I teach you coping mechanisms to deal with the cravings and give you all the tools you need to live an alcohol-free life.
Learn more about my Gray Area Drinking Coaching Program